Cliff Lee don't leave

I am confident in the fact that somehow Cliff Lee will end up reading this very entry to my blog, so I am going to try my best to plead for him to stay with Rangers. I have loved the Rangers forever, and have been obsessed with them forever. I'm the guy who would rather stay at home and watch a game then go out and possibly get laid at a club. Not that I would ever do that because clubs scare the fuck out of me, but you get the point, Cliff. When the Rangers sucked horribly for about 10 years I was still their biggest fan, and even when my friends made fun of me my obsession stayed strong. Besides the Rangers sucking for 10 years straight you know what else happened in those 10 years? They never had a true ace. Never, ever. Never a pitcher of your quality. Sure we're used to a few home runs now and then, but the truth is I'd take a 1-0 game over a 10-7 game any day. Ranger fans haven't been able to truly appreciate a great pitcher in a long awhile, and now we can. I'm appreciating the fuck out of it. I've never seen anything like it as a Ranger fan. Chan Ho Park wasn't even one merry go round. You're fucking Disney Wand. That is world and land combined.


Us Ranger fans we're fawning over you. You're Elvis, and we're your fans who are throwing their underwear on your mound. Please let us enjoy it for more than a few months. You're likable, and not a douche so do the world a favor and stay with the Rangers. The Yankees? Fuck the Yankees. Be different Lee. Be the leader of a team that is taking off, and won't look back for a long time. You'll just be another superstar on the Yankees. You'll be the superstar on the Rangers with a whole bunch of very capable robin's to carry you to the rings that'll be placed on your fingers. I promise to go to as many games as I can. I promise that I'll tell everyone about you, and I promise I'll always truly and enjoy and appreciate it when you pitch. It's a treat. Not just any treat. It's a running down the Ice Cream Truck treat when you're 10 and it's hot outside, and the only thing that you want is something frozen and in the shape of a rocket with bright colors. That's you, Lee. You're the rocket, and we're the fuel.

Let's go to space together.


That's baseball for you.